They said the fantasy standings couldn’t get updated by Monday. But your boy the Jizzgod came through. (Hmm, not sure if that nickname is gonna stick.)

Angelina scored 7 points and gave me zero of the Angelina I wanted. Charlie scored 11, all for starting a needless war.

Individual scoring table

Immunity points: 3 points to Aubry, Chrissy, Coach, Colby, Genevieve, Joe, Tiffany.

VTEP points: One point to Christian, Emily, Ozzy, and Stephenie. One point as well to Cirie, Dee, Kamilla, and Rizo.

Pick-4 League

Sketti Legs and Lemon! are tied for first. But, much like Mariah Carey once said, “I don’t know her.” However, I do recognize Prom King and Storm’s Husband, who are tied for third. Catskill Survivor sits in 5th place. Orangealfy jumps up to 10th place. My child and Side Character are tied for 17th place, but they both lost Charlie this week.

Champions League:

Someone needs to do something about these kids! Child of B/V remains in pole position. Stick to the Plan is second, just ahead of Carterfan. Lira hangs on to 4th place despite losing Mike last week. And, sadly, we have our first fully eliminated team: Adam B’s fantasy season has come to an end with the Charlie boot.

Other leagues

Props to the 4-team leagues for having some great names this season. This week I’ll focus on Sofa Strategists, which I assume is named that because each member of the league works for the Rooms To Go sofa strategy department. It’s a pretty close race between three of the four teams at the moment. The Q Skirts are in the lead, but The Freak and The Geek (which I assume is just one person- a very kinky nerd) and Voted Out the Patriarchy (who has unfortunately not yet delivered on that promise) are within five points. But in last place, though certainly far from least, is…Greg. Cheers to you, Greg. Everyone else was trying to have fun with this and be creative, but you decided that tomfoolery wasn’t for you. Did everyone meet up for a coffee date to do this draft and you just ordered a tap water with no ice? Do you show up to the group’s Halloween party as “Guy who forgot to get a costume”? I hope the other three mocked you relentlessly, Greg.

You can find the pages for all our other leagues here (there are multiple tabs for these, depending on the size of the group).

John

John is the co-host of the Purple Rock Survivor Podcast. He’s pretty sure it’s just a fucking stick.

Favorite seasons: Heroes vs. Villains, Cagayan, Pearl Islands, Tocantins, Cambodia, Winners at War