Australian Survivor, Champions vs Contenders II: Episode 12, 13 & 14

Kemper Boyd

Welcome to another week of Australian Survivor. We have 14 players left, 7 Champions and 7 Contenders. Only 4 women are left, can they survive through merge San Juan Del Sur style? Can anyone ever remove David? Can Harry get rid of Janine? Let us see.

Episode 12:

  • John likes food. A Mexican Parma sounds gross and not at all Mexican.
  • Harry is right to be looking for another idol and Ross is doing a great job following him all over the island. Why did he let Harry give him the slip? Why aren’t the other 4 working really hard to chase him down? Harry continues to have no idea that Janine could have an idol herself.  Harry has a clue.
  • We see more of David and Shaun, I don’t find the alpha nonsense massively compelling personally, but this is traditional Australian Survivor. People make themselves big targets very early and it screws them long term. If David can survive to win I would be so shocked. I don’t see his or Shaun’s route to winning this season.
  • Harry does a bloody brilliant job of moving the flag pre challenge and being able to grab the idol in the shelter as everyone walks off.
  • The Challenge involves the tower again, I’m guessing production spent a lot on it. The prize is Chicken Parmas at the Pub. It’s a bloody fun challenge with blindfolded bellyflops and general amusement. Champions win and they choose Harry to go with them.
  • Matt makes a Space Jam reference, he’s a touch more likeable but also it’s basically merge, stop thinking about challenges and think about how to play the game.
  • Harry throws everything out to the Champions. Janine is the Godmother etc etc. But he thinks Matty was with him, but he wasn’t Matt voted for Harry too.
  • The original contenders talk about their need to go into merge up and Andy is willing to throw some challenges. This like the old Champs throwing the last challenge to vote out Casey in the end (although it’s waste to throw to take out Casey when Matt was right there), it’s the right move for the original contenders to try and save Harry and Matt.
  • The Champs get a good start at throwing the challenge when Luke misses a piece on the slide and then Daisy can’t get through the sledgehammer portion but then Baden doesn’t get the message and wins the puzzle as Andy is being way to obvious in his throw. They needed to have players like John and Shaun in on the throw too, to slow down before the puzzle.
  • Somehow the 5 are planning to put all their votes on Harry, which is very stupid. It’s 5 v 2, just do a 3-2 split JUST IN CASE.
  • Harry has wisely decided to target Pia as she is hidden behind Janine and Janine may have an idol. But decides to go to try and flip Ross and Simon as the barely ever talked about, all male alliance. You know because there aren’t many men around and it would be best to protect each other.
  • I would like to have a sidebar about how much I dislike the group of Abbey, Janine and Pia being called girls. These are women aged 28, 55 and 46. Janine has a kid older than Matt.
  • Back to Matt at the well trying to convince Simon to vote Pia. Now, it’s not a bad shout to remind Simon he is at the bottom of the 5. But better at the bottom of a tight 5 going into merge than in the middle of a weak 3 or 4.
  • Harry’s waterworks with Ross are compelling and really funny to have the emotional music from the producers. He has Ross convinced though.
  • At Tribal Janine calls Harry a cockroach and Harry says Janine is in charge. Harry throws a pitch to the boys to go over to the side and pick one of the women.
  • Harry plays his idol. Janine plays her idol on herself. Why doesn’t Ross or Simon say “hey they were telling us Pia” to Janine. Votes come down 3 for Harry, 2 for Matt and 2 for Pia and Matt is voted off on the revote. I am really glad that they decided to split the vote in the end. Mostly because if I have to watch a merge with only 2 or 3 women I am going to hate it.

Episode 13

  • We get a lovely Ross montage. Oh no Ross, is it you? He’s a bloody great character.
  • Andy thinks he is Kim Spradlin levels of Survivor genius and he is just not. I really loved the editors throwing his “on a scale of 1-Clueless I’d say they are a ten” right next to Luke talking about how obvious it was he was throwing it.
  • I deeply love Luke creeping on Andy then deciding to pick up Baden based on Baden not throwing the challenge. Has he found his new Jericho?
  • Harry vs Janine is a really lovely story. His luring the others out to look for an idol so he can talk to Janine and try and sell her on him being useful to her.
  • At the Immunity Challenge, David decides Andy sits out. Clever.
    Ross takes a really nasty fall into the platform on the rope swing portion as the rope breaks as he is swinging. Looks like he hits it full force with his shin. He is removed from the field of play to be examined and the challenge continues. Champions win the challenge.
  • Janine decides to convince Abbey and Pia to work with Harry. This is stupid. Let’s take out the strong, strategically unseen Simon to save a bloke who put toothpicks in his mouth at tribal and started out on the other side. Abbey will not vote for him. Pia is all for a Simon blindside.
  • Ross broke his ankle and he has been pulled. IT WAS ROSCO.
  • Now we know that Ross isn’t continuing, it is brilliant strategic game play by Pia and Janine to make Harry think he was already in with them. If they can take him over and make it 7-5 for the Champions it will be a huge move. If they can put together a loser alliance with Baden and Luke that still puts them 7-5 up.
  • I am really looking forward to the merge now we lost two blokes and one from each side, it’s going to be interesting.

Episode 14

  • MERGE
  • First reward is for a crate. WHAT’S IN THE CRATE?

  • Lots of people drop for food. John drops before the Mexican Parma is available. Andy drops for it. David, Daisy and Simon all refuse to drop for an advantage in the immunity challenge. That’s a bit dumb.
  • Daisy wins the crate.
  • Andy is such a douche about the tribe name. He was thinking about Solibula, “welcome together” or so he tells them, in fact is means “sacrifice”. He’s a weirdo. No one has thought about their own edit this much since Tony.
  • The Champions reunite, but Lukey stays behind, clever Lukey.
  • Dave tells the Champions about Andy being a huge snake, but he’s not really snake clever, David calls him a worm.
  • Pia has a great confessional about her game, she’s played a social game and has lined up Janine as a meat-shield which is great. Her winner edit is strong.
  • Daisy looks in the crate: it’s all the food from the challenge and the advantage. Plus a phone to call home. That is a fucking great reward. Daisy is obsessed with rain, I get it, being a farmer in Australia must be really hard, your own government will fuck you over and cause global warming but pretend they are on your side. What is the right move for her here? Carbo load? Pasta, then pizza, then the chicken for protein, then some pudding? The bath is really small though.
  • She also finds an idol, which is too big a reward. It’s just too big, come at me producers! This is bad production, too big a thing to give out. Unless it was a single use, so she essentially won immunity.
  • David thinks Daisy is lying because she didn’t mention finding a clue or an idol. Of course she didn’t say “oh and I found an idol” or “plus an idol clue”. Why would she? David has decided the Champs need to make her nervous to flush it, he is right.
  • Immunity Challenge is holding up 60% of your bodyweight in a barrel by holding a rope. This is too similar to the last challenge for me. Boring. Daisy starts 10 minutes after everyone else. (Please note my shitty lodger has walked into the room, started chatting and eating loudly with her mouth open). Shaun wins immunity. This is also not a surprise as the two most recent professional athletes out there lasted the longest. Abbey last played 2017 season and Shaun played in 2016.
  • “you mess with the big dog and you get the bull by the horns, brother” is a remarkable mixed metaphor.
  • The Champs want to put their votes on Andy and John and Harry seem ok. John doesn’t like him, Harry doesn’t care as long as he’s safe. If you were Daisy would you waste an idol on Andy? here? nah.
  • Shaun doesn’t like the arrogance of how the contenders are playing with and tells Daisy to play her idol for Andy, as I just said, she doesn’t want to. You are better off holding the idol and using it to remove a Champion at a better time and split them apart.
  • Janine calls herself the “Perfume Scorpion” this is a bad nickname. She thinks this is the time to take a shot at David. This is not the time to take a shot at David, that’s after you have removed Andy and probably Shaun. Then you move on David.
  • David continues to make Daisy uncomfortable to make her use an idol. This appears not to have been too tough.
  • Andy throws the worst line ever to David. That the challenge throw wasn’t a throw, rather it was him pretending to throw so that Shaun and Daisy would think he was throwing it.
  • Tribal time: it’s still Champs vs Contenders, David pretends it’s not. Luke blows up Andy’s spot about him trying to make a move on Daisy. Top work from Luke to make Daisy nervous and push for a flip on revote if it’s 6 v 6. David throws on about honour in claiming your moves. Andy now feels like he’s in trouble, because of course he is. This has been a great performance from David and Luke. Making Daisy nervous, throwing Andy under the bus. Daisy is an idiot and plays her idol for herself. Stupid. Really bad.
  • Andy is voted out, Daisy only negates Andy’s vote for her and he is voted out 11-1. He blows up David’s idol before he walks out wihtout actually knowing if David had an idol of not and that is his best play of the season by a fucking mile.
  • Andy was a bad player, I will stick by this. He made no moves that stuck, did nothing of note beyond being able to throw and do puzzles. His strategic play was over the top and obvious.

Thoughts guys?